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Cradle Of Filth sell their own “satanic” teas

By | Published on Tuesday 4 August 2020

Cradle Of Filth

A cup of tea is a lovely thing. Everyone likes a nice cup of tea. But sometimes, don’t you just wish that your cup of tea was less nice and just a little more, well, satanic? Of course you do! Well, thankfully, Cradle Of Filth are here with not one but two satanic teas for you to brew up.

The new blends were created in collaboration with tea company Pitch Black North, which specialises in occult brews. Inspired by songs by the band, they are Dark Blood – a traditional English breakfast tea “for the uplift” – and Sweetest Maleficia – a blueberry vanilla English breakfast tea “for the wind-down”.

“If [there’s] anything this weird space of time known as ‘lockdown’ has taught us, [it’s] that literally everything can be mollified with a really good cup of tea”, say the band. “These expertly crafted beverages are not only bursting with maleficent flavour, but they also swim abrim with genuine witchcraft, having been brewed under all the right stars”.

More witchcraft in tea, I say. And so, the band invite you to “put the heavy kettle on, put some heavy metal on and start conversing with your inner TEAmons”.

Should you be looking for something to do while you drink your tea (conversing with ‘teamons’ notwithstanding), Cradle Of Filth have also – like all rock and metal bands recently, for some reason – released their own jigsaw.



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