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TODAY'S NEWS
Top Stories
Terra firma sue Citigroup over their EMI acquisition
Brown seemingly tweets about poor record sale frustration
In The Pop Courts
Apple countersue Nokia
Buju Banton in prison over drug charges
Martial arts event subject to DMX lawsuit cancelled
Blues label sues Google and Microsoft
Charts, Stats & Polls
X-Factor Joe favourite for Christmas number one, though RATM currently leading iTunes charts
Release News
Download free Crookers
Gigs N Tours News
New Young Pony Club announce UK tour
Polar Bear free download and live dates
Memory Tapes UK dates
Talks, Debates N Trade Fairs
International Music Summit 2010 announced
Eurosonic Noorderslag speakers line-up completed
The Digital Business
Green Day to become Rock Band
Chart Of The Day
Chart update
And finally...
Lil Wayne's house stinks of dope, shocker
Pink pissed with the royals
Kid Cudi punches fan
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MONDAY 14TH DECEMBER


CMU-TUBE: A READERS' 2009 SELECTION
So, we've spent four week's picking tracks released in 2009 almost at random and sticking them on playlists, now it's time to hand the task over to someone who's put a bit more thought into it. Namely, all of you. Since last month you've been voting for your favourite tracks of 2009, and now we're into the home strait. This week's playlist is a run down of the top ten tracks in the poll so far. The count is pretty tight, though. Between now and Friday (when voting closes), there's plenty of opportunity to move your favourite up the list, or get it placed if it's currently not in there. Cast your vote here and then check out these videos at www.theCMUwebsite.com/tube
 
01: Grizzly Bear - Two Weeks
Our current leader, and deservedly so. 'Two Weeks' took Grizzly Bear's underlying buzz and turned them into weird folk heroes almost instantly.

02: Temper Trap - Sweet Disposition
I'm not sure any of the rest of The Temper Trap's material lives up to this track, but what a track it is. Here they are performing it live in The Fly's courtyard.

03: Friendly Fires - Kiss Of Life
Yay! Samba! It's a carnival and Friendly Fires have told us that you're all invited. Just don't bring any drums with you, they've already got plenty.

04: Horrors - Sea Within A Sea
Such a high ranking for this band would have been unexpected back in January. The Horrors surprised everyone by getting a lot better in 2009.

05: Dirty Projectors - Stillness Is The Move
This is such a great track. I'm not trying to influence your vote, it just is. The right balance of weird and R&B. Who'd have thought there was a right balance of those two things?

06: Dizzee Rascal - Bonkers
Some people think he's bonkers, but he just thinks he's free. Man, he's just living life, there's nothing crazy about him.

07: Animal Collective - My Girls
Animal Collective's latest album 'Merriweather Post Pavilion' got into the Top 40 in January. Now one of their singles is in the top ten. Well, a top ten.

08: La Roux - Bulletproof
Obviously a fair few of you like La Roux. Once again, I don't want to appear as if I'm trying to influence the vote or anything, but La Roux are utter shite.

09: The Molotovs - Come To Grief
A rank outsider, but one with a strong batch of votes coming in, we don't have a video for this song, or any of The Molotovs' songs for that matter, but we do have a video of them speaking to CMU's Chris Cooke.

10: Bon Iver - Blood Bank
Bah! Another song without a video. Well, why not watch Bon Iver performing 'Skinny Love' live on Jools Holland and just pretend it's the right song?

So, that's it. That is how the top ten currently looks. But it is not the final list. That won't be decided until Friday at 5pm. Up until then, it's still all to play for. Make sure your favourite track of 2009 is represented by voting right here.

Watch these ten videos, plus our previous four 2009 playlists, at www.theCMUwebsite.com/tube

 
CMU ALBUMS OF THE YEAR: King Cannibal - Let The Night Roar
As we head towards the end of the year, we'll be revealing, in no particular order, our ten favourite albums of 2009. Today, King Cannibal's 'Let The Night Roar'.

"You've got about one hour to think about what you've done to me", a voice announces at the start of King Cannibal's debut album. I'm not exactly sure what it is I'm supposed to have done, but from the sound of the next hour of music, I'm not a very nice person.

 

Merging influences from drum n bass, dancehall and dubstep, King Cannibal, aka Dylan Richards, operates in similar territory to follow Ninja Tune-signee The Bug. But where The Bug brings in MCs to lament the ills of modern society, Richards goes straight for samples taken from obscure films and video games, and pulls things down to a much darker place.

There are a few collaborations, though. Berlin electronic outfit Jahcoozi, French hip hop duo Face à Face and MC Daddy Freddy all appear, adding further to the album's varied textures. Daddy Freddy's shouts, over bass that slices and throbs like a failing heartbeat making a last ditch fear-fuelled attempt at survival, are a particular highlight on 'Dirt'. Elsewhere, 'Aragami Style' sets the tone for the album nicely, while recent single 'Embrace The Minimum' acts as a moment of lighter, more ambient tones, converse to 'Colder Still', a reworking of early single 'Call Me Mr Cold Blooded', which further explores the torture themes often hinted at in other tracks.

All of which makes the album sound like an unpleasant experience, but that's really not the case. It's eleven impressively well-crafted tracks that stretch Richards' influences to their limits in order to take you on a journey that is both cathartic and exciting. It's nothing as unseemly as a dubstep concept album, but 'Let The Night Roar' certainly features one of the most complete sets of tracks you'll hear on an electronic long player this year.

iTunes - Amazon - Spotify

 

 
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TERRA FIRMA SUE CITIGROUP OVER THEIR EMI ACQUISITION
Isn't it funny how those vastly over paid City boys sometimes justify their offensively large pay packets by saying that they deserve them because of the risks they take and the responsibility they saddle, but then when the shit hits the fan they look for others to bail them out, and blame everyone else for any risky decisions they took that backfired big time.

Although, to be fair, Terra Firma and its chief Guy Hands are probably shifting the blame for their disastrous EMI gamble more to strengthen their negotiating position rather than to absolve themselves of blame for a big bold deal that has seriously backfired.

So, yes, Terra Firma are suing the financial backers of their EMI purchase back in 2007, Citigroup. The lawsuit, filed in the New York court last week, comes after months of negotiations between the private equity firm and the American bank.

As previously reported, with EMI struggling to even meet the interest payments of the Citigroup loan Terra Firma saddled the music company with as part of its 2007 acquisition of the firm, Hands wanted the bank to write off about a billion of the major's debts, in return for a commitment by his equity group to pump a similar amount into the company to safeguard its future and enable further restructuring.

Terra Firma are tired of having to hand over more cash to EMI in order to help it meet its interest payments. Of course, the deal Hands put to Citigroup would require his company to pump even more money into the music major, but at least that would be to fund further development rather than just to keep the bailiffs away from the door. And a dramatic reduction in EMI's overall debt would help boost the value of Terra Firma's portfolio, the overall value of which has slumped as a result of the equity outfit's failure to turn round EMI's fortunes.

But, as previously reported, Citigroup has knocked back all of Terra Firma's debt restructuring proposals to date, hence the lawsuit.

So, what have the equity boys got on the bank? Well, they reckon Citigroup execs provided misinformation to Terra Firma prior to the EMI purchase, or, rather, they failed to give Hands and his team the crucial information that all rival bidders for the major, and in particular Cerberus Capital Management, had dropped out of the running.

Thinking that there were still rivals, Team Terra Firma upped their offer. The equity firm's lawsuit says Citigroup deliberately misled them because the bank was providing services and loans to both them and EMI, and reaped greater rewards by seeing a successful higher-offer Terra Firma acquisition going through.

Citi are basically accused of having a conflict of interest in the EMI deal. Big banks often do have conflicts of interest in major deals like this - because it's common for banks to be providing differing services to two sides of one deal - but it's assumed execs inside the bank act responsibly. Most probably do, but when an equity firm like Terra Firma falls out with its bank, then the conflict of interest card is always there ready to be played.

As well as bad behaviour before the EMI deal, Terra Firma are also accusing the bank of more recent improper conduct. They say the bank has been trying to destabilise EMI, because they'd rather see the music company collapse. That way, as sole backer of Terra Firma's acquisition, they could seize the major's assets and sell them off to recover the money they lent - possibly to a Warner Music-led consortium.

Terra Firma say that Citigroup's outright refusal to restructure EMI's debts was motivated by the desire to see the music company collapse. Said accusations may have been aided by an analyst, in another bit of Citigroup, recently saying that a merger with Warner was basically the only way EMI could avoid bankruptcy. Such observations, while possibly valid, won't be welcomed by Terra Firma, especially given reports that - having failed to renegotiate the music firm's debts with Citigroup - they are now charming other City institutions to try and rally up new investment for EMI.

Some commentators have remarked that for Hands to sue Citigroup, a bank he has partnered with for years, is a sign of just how bad things are at EMI. The recent Beatles re-issue campaign coupled with Robbie William's new album means that the recordings division of the major - where most of the losses are usually made - has been performing a little better over the last few months. Some reckon that, as a result, EMI will be able to meet its next Citigroup interest payment without needing another bail out from Terra Firma. But clearly Hands sees nothing but doom and gloom at the music company for the year to come, hence the drastic measures.

Citigroup, for their part, deny all the allegations made against them in Terra Firma's lawsuit. The bank might claim that by suing for $1.5 billion in damages over the alleged misinformation, Terra Firma are trying to strong arm them into writing off $1 billion of EMI's debts, as the equity firm had wanted. Either way, those who reckon EMI will soon only exist as a division of the Warner Music Group have an ever increasing pile of evidence in support of their claim.

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BROWN SEEMINGLY TWEETS ABOUT POOR RECORD SALE FRUSTRATION
Reports were rampant this weekend that shamed R&Bster Chris Brown was angry that some US record shops were refusing to stock, or at least give prominence, to his new album 'Graffiti'.

Although there has been no actual proof US retailers have been shunning Brown's new long player, released in America last Tuesday, midweek charts suggest the album is set to debut at number three in this week's US chart having shifted about 120,000 units. Not that bad, but not that great either, especially compared to what Brown might have expected to shift this time last year, before beating up ex-girlfriend Rihanna back in February. Said ex shifted about 70,000 more units in the first week of sale of her recently released album 'Rated R'.

Reports that Brown was blaming disappointing sales on supposed retail boycotts stem from comments on the Mechnical Dummie Twitter feed, which seems to have official links to Brown and has "verified" status from the micro-blogging site. I'm not sure who actually types the words that appear on the feed, but the words that have been most quoted this weekend were much more confrontational than most of the "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry" statements that have come from Brown of late.

The most quoted two tweets were as follows: "I'm tired of this shit. Major stores r blackballing my cd. Not stocking the shelves and lying to costumers. What the fuck do I gotta do - yeah I said it and I ain't retracting shitt. I'm not biting my tongue about shitt else... the industry can kiss my ass".

No official comment from the Brown camp as to whether those words came from the man himself, nor on whether management really believe there's been a retail boycott.

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APPLE COUNTERSUE NOKIA
Countersuit of the day goes to Apple, who are countersuing Nokia in relation to the mobile maker's previously reported lawsuit which accused the IT firm of infringing its patents in the manufacture of the iPhone.

As previously reported, Nokia accused Apple of patent infringement back in October, basically in a bid to try to force the IT firm to pay it a licence fee on the sale of their rather successful iPhone. Now Apple are saying Nokia has infringed some of its patents in the manufacture of their phone handsets.

Apple's legal man said: "Other companies must compete with us by inventing their own technologies, not just by stealing ours".

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BUJU BANTON IN PRISON OVER DRUG CHARGES
Reggae man Buju Banton is in prison in the US after being found to be in possession of five kilos of cocaine, which I think even he would struggle to claim was exclusively for private use. Police found the drugs after arresting the singer in Miami last Thursday. He'll be done for possession with intent to deal the drug, which could result in 20 years in prison.

Still, being in trouble for drugs makes a nice change for Banton, who is one of the dancehall and reggae stars whose attempts to gig have been hindered in recent years in some cities because of homophobic lyrics in some of his earlier songs. Said controversy materialised again not long before his arrest when Banton was nominated for Best Reggae Album in next year's Grammys.

While Banton's people insist he no longer performs his more controversial anti-gay songs, some gay rights campaigners say they are not convinced the reggae man has really repented, and that he should not, therefore, be up for a prestigious American music award.

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MARTIAL ARTS EVENT SUBJECT TO DMX LAWSUIT CANCELLED
The celebrity martial arts event subject to the latest DMX lawsuit was cancelled this weekend. As previously reported, DMX was due to take part in a celebrity martial arts competition, competing with actor and sometime boxer Eric Martinez. But the hip hopper pulled out of the event.

DMX's people say the event's promoters couldn't assure his safety. Promoters Thunder claimed DMX had insisted they rig the competition so he'd win. Once he'd pulled out of the gig, Thunder sued the rapper.

In the meantime, they booked Coolio to take DMX's place at the competition, which was due to take place on Saturday. But it seems that Coolio wasn't as big a draw as DMX, or perhaps the last minute line up change hindered marketing. Either way, the event was pulled at the last minute, seemingly due to poor ticket sales.

All of which presumably means Thunder will be even more keen to pursue their claim for damages against DMX through the courts.

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BLUES LABEL SUES GOOGLE AND MICROSOFT
A small US-based blues-focused record label called Blues Destiny Records has named Google and Microsoft as defendants in a lawsuit against European file-sharing service Rapidshare (file-sharing in the yousendit.com sense, rather than the LimeWire/Pirate Bay sense).

They are not the first people to sue Rapidshare for copyright infringement because, of course, some people use the file-sharing platform to share unlicensed music files. While Rapidshare is not a P2P network, so files pumped through their system can only be accessed by people who are given a special URL by the sharer, German collecting society GEMA convinced Germany's courts that enabling the distribution of unlicensed content was, in itself, infringement. Rapidshare subsequently introduced various filters that in theory stop unlicensed content being shared via their networks, although other sites still list illegally shared content, which then shows up on search engines.

Blues Destiny are suing Google and Microsoft, as well as Rapidshare directly, because they claim the two company's search engines provide prominent links to Rapidshare URLs that in turn provide unlicensed music. They also allege that both search engine companies have failed to respond to takedown notices they have issued regarding Rapidshare links, under the framework set up by the US's Digital Millennium Copyright Act.

The lawsuit says: "Defendants facilitated, materially contributed to, and caused infringement of plaintiff's copyrighted recordings for defendant's financial benefit by knowingly and systematically directing internet users, via search results generated by their respective search engines, to the illegal and infringing copies of plaintiff's recordings on rapidshare.com and similar websites, without authorisation from plaintiff".

It's an ambitious lawsuit to say the least, given Rapidshare are arguably already complying with the content filtering obligations set down by the aforementioned DMCA, while US copyright law provides a lot of protection to search engines who link to unlicensed content. Failure to respond to takedown notices does go against the search engines, though it's possible they failed to respond because they don't believe such notices relating to Rapidshare links are valid.

None of the defendants have as yet responded to the lawsuit.

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X-FACTOR JOE FAVOURITE FOR CHRISTMAS NUMBER ONE, THOUGH RATM CURRENTLY LEADING ITUNES CHARTS
So, we now know that it will be Joe McElderry who will take on Rage Against The Machine in the battle for Christmas number one. If he wants anything nearing a credible music career, he should come out in support of 'Killing In The Name' for the festive top spot.

McElderry beat fellow finalist Olly Murs to become this year's winner of ITV talent show 'X-Factor' last night, the two having seen off competition from third placer Stacey Soloman the night before. He's now set to reach the dizzy heights of pop stardom previously only seen by the likes of Steve Brookstein and Leon Jackson.

But before all that excitement there's the business of this week's Christmas chart, which, if only because of tradition, McElderry is now the bookies' favourite to top. So, sorted. Except, of course, for the Facebook campaign to get Rage Against The Machine's sweary 'Killing In The Name' into the festive top spot instead, mainly to bloody the nose of the Cowell machine, even though the song is released and published by his business partners Sony Music.

The bet takers still reckon McElderry is most likely to get the Christmas number one, like the preceding 'X-Factor' winners, but with 718,648 people signed up to the anti-X Facebook group (as I write), I'm becoming less cynical about this campaign's chances of succeeding.

While it's true that RATM had a headstart, because McElderry's cover of Miley Cyrus tune 'The Climb' only went on sale after last night's 'X-Factor' show, and while he, unlike RATM, will benefit from CD sales as of this morning, the fuck song is currently number one in the iTunes Top 10, while the 'X-Factor' tune is trailing at number ten.

Last year's 'X-Factor' champ Alexandra Burke topped the Christmas chart by selling 576,000 units. Beating those kinds of sales would rely on a relatively high number of those signed up to the Facebook group coming good on their promise to buy the RATM single. But, while 'X-Factor' is as popular as ever, remember that Burke had the advantage of being given a great song to sing.

While we might not have all appreciated her version of Leonard Cohen's 'Hallelujah', it is a classic rousing number, with a Christmassy name, if not lyrics. McElderry has been handed a song so dull, you'd struggle to even say anything negative about it.

How many people bought 'Hallelujah' because they were 'X-Factor' fans, and how many because they liked the tune? I reckon sales of 'The Climb' could be a lot less than 576,000, which, coupled with the passion with which thousands of people have embraced the RATM campaign, means I don't think McElderry is as assured his Christmas number one as some bookies reckon. Either way, I think we'll all be watching this week's midweek chart reports more closely than usual.

With the RATM campaign getting so much press, now loads more anti-commercial bands with records to flog are proclaiming themselves as the best 'X-Factor' antidote. If I didn't think the RATM project had a chance of actually winning the Christmas number one battle I'd support the campaign to get the wonderful Tim Minchin to number one, but given the way things are going, I think anyone wanting to kick it to the man should stick with Zach and co.

In sort of related news, Miley Cyrus's version of 'The Climb' has been taken off the shortlist for the Best Film Song Grammy. Though not because it's so tedious a song it sent all the Grammy judges to sleep, but because the song, although appearing in the 'Hannah Montana' film, wasn't specifically written for the movie, so is not actually eligible for the prize. Why it was shortlisted before anyone noticed I don't know.

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DOWNLOAD FREE CROOKERS
Crookers will release their debut album, 'Tons Of Friends', via Southern Fried on 8 Mar, but the duo are giving away a track as a free download right now. 'We Love Animals' features Soulwax and Mixhell, both of whom we like a great deal. We like this track a great deal, too. It's weird. And good. And it makes us feel funny.

Get it here: crookers.net/weloveanimals.html

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NEW YOUNG PONY CLUB ANNOUNCE UK TOUR
New Young Pony Club are back, and they can prove it. Not only will they release a new album on 1 Mar, but they will head out on a tour of the UK from 15 Mar.

If you need immediate proof of their continued existence, I'd suggest you get yourself over to www.newyoungponyclub.com and download their very, very good new track, 'Lost A Girl'. It's free. And good.

15 Mar: Portsmouth, Wedgewood Rooms
16 Mar: Birmingham, Academy 2
17 Mar: Bristol, The Thekla
18 Mar: Oxford, Academy 2
20 Mar: Manchester, Moho Live
21 Mar: Leeds, Cockpit 2
22 Mar: Nottingham, Stealth
23 Mar: Glasgow, King Tuts
25 Mar: Newcastle, Academy 2
26 Mar: Liverpool, Korova
27 Mar: Cambridge, Junction 2

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POLAR BEAR FREE DOWNLOAD AND LIVE DATES
Mercury nominees Polar Bear will release their fourth album, 'Peepers', on 1 Mar via The Leaf Label. You can get yourself a free download of the album's title track right now soundcloud.com/benwl/polar-bear-peepers

The band will be previewing more music from the album when they head out on tour in the early months of 2010. Here are the dates:

29 Jan: Alton, Alton College
30 Jan: Colchester, Lakeside Theatre
19 Feb: Brighton, The Old Market
20 Feb: Canterbury, The Farmhouse
24 Feb: Cambridge, The Junction
2 Mar: London, The Garage
26 Mar: Windsor, The Firestation

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MEMORY TAPES UK DATES
Memory Tapes, aka Dayve Hawk, will be over in the UK for two shows next month, to coincide with the release of new single 'Graphics' on 19 Jan.

The dates are these:

16 Jan: Manchester, The Corner
20 Jan: London, Luminaire

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INTERNATIONAL MUSIC SUMMIT 2010 ANNOUNCED
Details of the 2010 International Music Summit in Ibiza have been announced. Now in its third year, it will see leading executives and artists from the electronic music industry converge on the Ibiza Gran Hotel on 26-18 May.

The event's co-founder, Pete Tong, says: "The IMS is delighted to announce our return to Ibiza in May 2010, and also our return to the perfect surroundings of the Ibiza Gran Hotel, probably the best setting imaginable for an international electronic music conference. IMS is committed to helping develop the global scene that I'm so heavily involved in, and I hope industry people and clubbers alike choose to spend their time on the island around this very special gathering of global players and thinkers".

Further information is available at www.internationalmusicsummit.com

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EUROSONIC NOORDERSLAG SPEAKERS LINE-UP COMPLETED
Next month's Eurosonic Noorderslag music conference in the Netherlands will feature keynote speeches from music industry expert Bob Lefsetz, Rolling Stone's Steve Knopper and business model specialist Alexander Osterwalder.

We know this because the programme for the convention bit of the event has now been announced. In total the conference will feature over 100 panels including more than 250 industry professionals. And that's on top of the showcases that feature some of Europe's best upcoming bands.

It all takes place on 14-16 Jan. If you want to know more, head over to www.eurosonic-noorderslag.nl

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GREEN DAY TO BECOME ROCK BAND
Green Day have been announced as the next band to get their own 'Rock Band' video game, following on from The Beatles, which must mean we're edging ever closer to a Status Quo version of the game. Don't get me wrong, I like Green Day and all, but they're not exactly known for the variation in their songs.

Anyway, Billie Joe Armstrong reckons it'll be good. He said this: "We've worked with the 'Rock Band' team in the past year to enable our fans to play tracks from '21st Century Breakdown', and we're excited to now be working on a game spanning our entire career. We want people to fire this up, choose their favourite Green Day tracks and play along with us as 'Rock Band' avatars so they can feel what it's like to perform on stage as Green Day".

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CHART UPDATE
I'm not a big fan of Lady Gaga, I'm not sure if I've made that clear at any point this year, but it does always fill me with a warm glow when an artist makes a slow climb to the number one position. It's like the olden days when everything was much better and there was no war or sadness in the world. And these days, spending seven weeks on the chart before hitting the top counts as a slow climb.

Back in the olden days, I would now have spent a whole paragraph questioning whether or not she could hold out for another week and get the Christmas number one (you know, when I was seven years old and writing about this stuff). But we both know that's not going to happen, so I won't waste any valuable space on such things. Let's just say, Rage Against The Machine fans will be pleased to know that the X-Factor winner's single is one of the most boring pieces of music ever recorded.

Lady Gaga's ascension to the top does mean that 'The Official Children In Need Medley' has now slipped to number two. So Gaga is now officially responsible for children continuing to be in need. Next time you see a child in need, just remind them of that.

There's just one new entry in this week's top ten, a track by Chuckie & LMFAO which you may know as 'Let The Bass Kick In Miami Bitch', or 'Let The Bass Kick In Miami Beach', or 'Let The Bass Kick In Miami Girl', or 'Let The Bass Kick In Miami', or just 'Let The Bass Kick'. Whatever you're favoured title for the track, it's at number eight.

There are three other new entries on the whole chart. They are these: Sir Terry Wogan & Aled Jones with the double-A side 'Silver Bells/Me And My Teddy Bear' at 27, 'Ego' by The Saturdays at 35, and Wham!'s Christmas classic, 'Last Christmas' at 39. The other two Christmas singles on the chart are currently fairing better, with 'The Pogues' 'Fairytale Of New York' at eighteen and Mariah Carey's 'All I Want For Christmas Is You' at nineteen.

The album chart is really, really boring this week, so I reckon we can get it done in just one sentence. Susan Boyle is still at number one and new entries this week come from Bette Midler's best of at 26, 30 Seconds To Mars with 'This Is War' at 31, and Seal's 'Hits' at 37. Yep, I was right.

In fact, all of this week's charts are so dull that, while announcing them on Radio 1, Reggie Yates had to be constantly slapped by people from The Official Charts Company.

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LIL WAYNE'S HOUSE STINKS OF DOPE, SHOCKER
So, want to know what a couple considering buying Lil Wayne's Miami property think of the rapper's home? Well, why not. I think this is news because, according to the New York Post, the estate agent showing the Miami apartment, currently rented by the hip hopper but now up for sale, is warning prospective buyers to expect a strong dope aroma when they view the property.

One house viewer told the Post: "My fiancée and I called to make an appointment to see it, and the broker, deadpan, goes, 'I have two questions: Are you offended by the smell of marijuana, and do you mind coming late in the afternoon? It's currently rented by Lil Wayne, and these are not morning people'".

When they viewed the apartment they discovered what the estate agent meant about the dope smell, and also found the customary scantily clad women you'd expect a rapper's home to possess. But other than that, the soon to be incarcerated rapper is apparently very neat.

The house viewer continued: "Once we got there, a member of Wayne's posse opened the door to the overwhelming smell of marijuana. Two hot, rap-video-looking girls were walking around in nothing but a bra and underwear, blasting hip hop. We just went in and looked around and tried not to stare. He had a perfectly organised closet of crisp t-shirts on hangers, neatly stacked piles of XXL magazine, and a fully stocked bar featuring multiple bottles of Hennessy Black".

So there you go.

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PINK PISSED WITH THE ROYALS
Pink is still a little pissed off that Prince William didn't respond to an anti-hunting letter she sent to the royal way back in 2003. As we reported at the time, the Pinkster wrote to the Prince after hearing she'd been his first choice for the entertainment at his 21st birthday party. The letter said she'd only consider playing for the royal if he gave up hunting.

The letter read: "I was happy to hear that I was your first choice to play at your 21st birthday bash, then disgusted to learn that you hunt and kill animals for fun and that you purposely rammed a spear through a tiny deer in Africa. Why? Was it some kind of 'trying to prove you're a man' trip? But hey, we all make mistakes in our lives and we can all change. Hopefully you'll have a change of heart and find more interesting things to do with your spare time than kill animals. Call me or PETA if you'd like any suggestions! Then maybe I'll come play at your next birthday!"

Pink has remarked before that the Prince failed to respond to that letter, and in a new interview with Q has accused William of being a "redneck" for failing to shun animal killing sports. Pink: "I wrote to him to protest about foxhunting and I figured he would be this stuffy, privileged asshole. But he's like a redneck from the south. If you're brought up shooting and hunting animals, if you really think it's second nature and you're blasting away, then it's hard to see the other point of view. You need educating".

Pink also isn't impressed that the Queen never responded to another letter she sent, in which she spoke out about the use of bearskins for those rather silly hats worn by soldiers in ceremonial dress outside royal buildings. Pink says: "To be truthful I was really surprised I didn't get a reply to that one. I wasn't just writing in and complaining, and it certainly was not a publicity stunt. I actually proposed a plan. Stella McCartney had designed these replacement hats for the guards using fake fur. I felt we were solving the problem for her and offering a viable solution. But she never wrote back. Maybe she doesn't have any of my stuff on her iPod".

You know, I'm not sure she's sending these letters to the right place because I'm pretty sure any letter to a royal will get a nominal response for some lackey in the royal household.

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KID CUDI PUNCHES FAN
It's not quite up there with Akon in terms of attacks on fans at gigs, but Kid Cudi is at least making an effort, by punching a fan who he thought had thrown a wallet at him. Said wallet was thrown on stage at a gig in Vancouver. Cudi initially seemed relaxed about it, and threw the wallet back into the audience. But it went to the wrong person. That person, being the honest type, threw it back onto the stage for a second time. It's that which earned him a thwack from the Cudster.

Someone called Michael Sharpe, claiming to be the punchee, told Rap Radar: "Some dude in the back threw their wallet at him. Being in the front, of course I'm gonna reach for it when he's like: 'Who wants this wallet?' I felt bad cause it wasn't mine, so I tossed it back. If you watch the video, clearly I didn't throw it at him. When he came down I thought he was gonna pull me on stage and I was like: 'Shit, I'm gonna get on stage'. I was just in awe. Pretty funny though, good story to tell my grandchildren when I'm old".

So there you go, honesty is always the best policy. Especially if it gets you punched by a celebrity.

Here's the video evidence: www.youtube.com/watch?v=gXydZ9kiX9E

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