FRIDAY 5 FEBRUARY 2016
TODAY'S TOP STORY: Hey, so Warner Music and Sony Music are going to share any cash they get from selling their shares in Spotify and other streaming services with all their bloody artists. Perhaps they've worked out that, in the wider scheme of things, it's not going to be that much money. There has been much speculation about Spotify launching its initial public offering for a while now, of course... [READ MORE]
 
TODAY'S APPROVED: Tomorrow the Kent Showground in Detling, just north of Maidstone, hosts the winter incarnation of the Social Festival. Thirteen hours of raving in a couple of massive tents. And as an all day event, you don't have to worry about ending up sleeping under a bush, or in one of Kent's many alligator-ridden swamps, while you wait for Sunday morning's first train... [READ MORE]
 
BEEF OF THE WEEK: Time-keeping's a funny thing, isn't it? I like to think that I am okay at it. At least, professionally speaking, I think it's important to arrive on time for things. Though I also have a tendency to get lost and misjudge how long it takes to travel to places. It is for this reason that I have missed more than one plane in my life. Okay, three. It's three. I've missed three planes. Shut up. Anyway, it... [READ MORE]
   
CMU PODCAST: CMU's Andy Malt and Chris Cooke review the week in music and the music business, including the SFX bankruptcy and its potential knock on effects, the RIAA adding streams into its Gold and Platinum sales awards, the PRS/PPL joint venture on performance rights licensing, and Rita Ora's legal battle with Roc Nation. The CMU Podcast is sponsored by 7digital... [LISTEN HERE]
TOP STORIES Free money all round, say Warner and Sony on Spotify IPO payouts
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LIVE BUSINESS SFX gets access to its bankruptcy loan
Norwich venue The Owl Sanctuary finds new home
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MEDIA New Executive Chairman at MTV owner
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EDUCATION & EVENTS Venues Day 2016 date announced
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ARTIST NEWS Earth, Wind & Fire's Maurice White dies
Phil Anselmo offers to quit Down, following racism row
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RELEASES The Field announces new album
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ONE LINERS CMU's One Liners: ASCAP, Help Musicians UK, Deezer, more
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AND FINALLY... CMU Beef Of The Week #292: Tidal v Universal
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Click JUMP to skip direct to a section of this email or ONLINE to read and share stories on the CMU website (JUMP option may not work in all email readers). For regular updates from Team CMU follow us on Twitter, Facebook or Tumblr.
 
 
DHP FAMILY - PROMOTIONS CO-ORDINATOR (LONDON)
Building on our success DHP are looking for an enthusiastic and pro-active Marketing Co-ordinator to work with the current marketing team and deliver marketing solutions and campaigns for our London based business.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
BUCKS MUSIC GROUP - PAID INTERNSHIP (LONDON)
Mute Song is seeking a dynamic individual to join the company as Music Publishing Assistant. This position presents a terrific opportunity for a bright and engaging person to embark on a rewarding career in music publishing.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
MUTE SONG - MUSIC PUBLISHING ASSISTANT (LONDON)
Mute Song is seeking a dynamic individual to join the company as Music Publishing Assistant. This position presents a terrific opportunity for a bright and engaging person to embark on a rewarding career in music publishing.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
BEGGARS MUSIC - COPYRIGHT AND ROYALTIES ANALYST (LONDON)
Beggars Music are looking to hire an experienced Copyright and Royalties Analyst, based in their London office. The role would be best suited to someone with experience of either working within music publishing administration or a collection society.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
LISTEN UP - PRESS MANAGER (LONDON)
We are hiring an experienced Press Manager to join the press team at Listen Up. The candidate will need 2-4 years' experience experience in a similar role with a thorough knowledge of artist and label campaigns. We are looking for an enthusiastic and articulate individual with strong writing and organisational skills.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
AEG LIVE - TICKETING ASSISTANT (LONDON)
We are now hiring a Ticketing Assistant to join our team. The successful candidate will support the day to day operations of the ticketing team for events within AEG Live & Goldenvoice.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
YOUR ARMY - MUSIC EVENTS AND PRESS OFFICER (LONDON)
Your Army is seeking a dynamic Music Events And Press Officer to join its expanding and busy Press Department and Promotions Team. The successful candidate will have a minimum of 2-3 years experience working across national music events and festivals alongside an adept understanding of both new and established artist campaigns.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
FMLY - BOOKING AGENT (BRIGHTON)
FMLY London is a booking agency based in Brighton and we are looking to expand our team and currently have an opening for an established booking agent.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
SECRET ROAD - MUSIC LICENSING CREATIVE (LONDON)
Secret Road Music Services, Inc is a boutique music services company based in Los Angeles, California that focuses on music licensing, music publishing and artist management. We are seeking a Music Licensing Creative to join our London team working out of offices in Kings Cross.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
CIRCUS RECORDS - PART-TIME PAID INTERNSHIP (LONDON)
Electronic record label seeking a pro-active, knowledgable intern for 20 hours per week to help out in all departments including label management, social media, press and merchandise. Main responsibilities will include, but are not limited to assisting the label team with DJ and club promotion, press, social media and other more general label activities.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING - COMMUNICATIONS ASSISTANT (LONDON)
In April 2016 we’ll be launching an Artist Engagement project to help us elicit support for our campaigns from prominent musicians. Esmée Fairbairn have awarded us funding to build on the success of our #MusicWithoutBarriers and Club Attitude campaigns. We are seeking a part-time Communications Assistant to work with us for two years.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING - ARTIST ENGAGEMENT AND COMMUNITY CO-ORDINATOR (LONDON)
In April 2016 we’ll be launching an Artist Engagement project to help us elicit support for our campaigns from prominent musicians. Esmée Fairbairn have awarded us funding to build on the success of our #MusicWithoutBarriers and Club Attitude campaigns. We are seeking a freelance Artist Engagement And Community Co-ordinator to work with us for two years.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
THE ORCHARD - INTERACTIVE MARKETING MANAGER (LONDON)
We’re looking for a savvy, seasoned digital music marketer to promote The Orchard’s distributed artists in Europe and beyond. The ideal candidate’s specialty lies in creating and executing strategic digital marketing campaigns designed to generate publicity and awareness, build audiences, engage fans, and drive sales and revenue for new releases and catalogue titles.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
CREAM - SOCIAL MEDIA & DIGITAL EXECUTIVE (LIVERPOOL)
Do you live and breathe social media? Have a passion for electronic music and festivals? Have a flair for design? Work well as part of a team? Enjoy working in a fast paced commercial environment? Then this could be the perfect job for you. Rare opportunity to join the Cream marketing team based in our new Liverpool offices.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
NUCLEAR BLAST RECORDS - ONLINE PROMOTIONS AND NEW MEDIA (LONDON)
Nuclear Blast UK are looking for maternity cover for the role of Online Promotion and New Media. The ideal candidate will have experience in all aspects of social media (including scheduling posts, adverts and maintaining label and roster channels), as well as managing online communities.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
   
LISTEN UP - OPERATIONS ASSISTANT (LONDON)
Listen Up is seeking an administrator to provide support to our expanding Operations Team. You will report directly to the Operations & HR Manager, working alongside the Office Manager and Accounts Manager to ensure company administration is completed to a high standard.

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here.
 
CMU Jobs is a proven way to recruit the best music business talent for roles across the industry at all levels, from graduate to senior management. To book an ad contact Sam on 020 7099 9060 or email ads@unlimitedmedia.co.uk
 
 
A guide to upcoming events from and involving CMU, including seminars, masterclasses and conference sessions from CMU Insights and workshops from CMU:DIY, plus other events where CMU journalists are speaking or moderating.
 
8 Feb 2016 CMU Insights Seminar: The Music Rights Sector
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10 Feb 2016 CMU Insights Masterclass: Key Developments In Music Rights
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15 Feb 2016 CMU Insights Seminar: The Live Sector, Brand Partnerships & Fan Services
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17 Feb 2016 CMU:DIY x Urban Development Industry Takeover Seminar
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18 Feb 2016 CMU Insights @ Output 2016
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22 Feb 2016 CMU Insights Seminar: Building A Fanbase - Social Media Tools
CLICK FOR INFO
29 Feb 2016 CMU Insights Seminar: Building A Fanbase - Music Media
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6 Mar 2016 CMU Insights Seminar: Building A Fan-Orientated Business
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16 Mar 2016 CMU:DIY x Urban Development Industry Takeover Seminar
CLICK FOR INFO
17 Mar 2016 CMU Insights @ Convergence 2016
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13 Apr 2016 CMU:DIY x Urban Development Industry Takeover Seminar
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14 Apr 2016 CMU Insights @ Music 4.5: Playlists 2
CLICK FOR INFO
6 May 2016 CMU Insights @ Canadian Music Week 2016
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19-20 May 2016 CMU Insights @ The Great Escape 2016
CLICK FOR INFO
 

Free money all round, say Warner and Sony on Spotify IPO payouts
Hey, so Warner Music and Sony Music are going to share any cash they get from selling their shares in Spotify and other streaming services with all their bloody artists. Perhaps they've worked out that, in the wider scheme of things, it's not going to be that much money.

There has been much speculation about Spotify launching its initial public offering for a while now, of course, though recent moves - not least the service's reported bid to raise another half billion through debt financing - suggests that the company could now float in the next year. And it's not just going to pretend to float like Deezer. No, it'll actually go through with the damn thing.

It's no secret that the major record companies - and, via Merlin, many of the indies - have a stake in Spotify, and other streaming music start-ups, which stem from their original licensing deals with these companies. This equity demand became the norm in label negotiations with digital music start-ups on the basis that - if, for the founders and early backers of said start-ups, the real payday would come when the business was sold - then the record companies should benefit from that first big sale too.

However, the label equity stakes have proven controversial in the wider music community, and especially among artists and managers. Few question the logic employed by the labels in demanding shares from digital start-ups, but there has been much debate over what would happen to the money generated if and when those shares were sold, ie would it be shared with the artists signed to the equity-holding labels?

Technically under the classic record contract, artists are only due a share of income that can be directly attributed to their recordings. Many managers and lawyers suspected that the labels would cite such clauses if artists made a claim for some of that equity money. Or, indeed, any of the other lump sums the labels receive from streaming companies, like set-up fees, unrecouped advances and miscellaneous kickbacks.

Said managers and lawyers argued that, if the labels did go that route - and for some time the majors, in particular, seemed to imply that they would - that would be unfair. Because all those upfront goodies from the streaming services could only be demanded because of the value of the amassed recordings made by all the artists any one record company had ever worked with. Moreover, some speculated that the majors may have agreed to less favourable revenue share and minimum guarantee rates - money that would definitely have to be shared with the artists - in return for better upfront kickbacks - which they could just keep.

This debate has been running for years, and came to a head last year over the so called 'breakage' element, that is to say the money advanced to labels by services in any one year which exceeds what the record company is then due based on usage.

Warner Music had introduced a policy early on to share this extra cash with artists, while many indies had signed up to the Fair Digital Deals Declaration via which they promised to "account to artists a good-faith pro-rata share of any revenues and other compensation from digital services that stem from the monetisation of recordings but are not attributed to specific recordings or performances".

"But what about Universal and Sony?" everyone started to muse, loudly. Loudly enough that both mega-majors subsequently put out statements saying, "Yeah, breakage, we'll share that, have some breakage cash, have it in a gift-wrapped box". Or words to that effect. "But what about the equity?" everyone then started to say. "Ah, for God's sake, we just gave you breakage, will you never be happy?" at least one major label exec mumbled.

Then yesterday, Warner Music announced it would take the lead here once again, in terms of the majors. Midway through the firm's latest earnings call, CEO Stephen Cooper noted that "streaming is on a trajectory to become our primary source of revenue", before adding: "While the main form of compensation we receive from streaming services is revenue based on actual streams, there are some services from which we receive additional forms of compensation ... in the event that we do receive cash proceeds from the sale of equity stake [in streaming services], we will also share this revenue with our artists".

He then reminded everyone that his company had a policy of sharing breakage with artists since way back in October 2009. "This policy stems from our desire to build deep and lasting partnerships with our artists", Cooper concluded. "We strongly believe that aligning our interests with those of our artists is not only good for our artists, but also good for us and the health of the music industry".

Ah, what a guy! And to be fair, there does seem to be a consensus in the management community that Warner is much more proactive than the other majors in this kind of artist relations. Possibly because - as by far the smallest of the majors - it sees it as a way to compete. Or because Warner - unlike Sony and Universal - has one single shareholder in Access Industries, rather than being ultimately owned by a publicly listed company with lots of investors to placate.

But hold on there everybody, don't be tarnishing Sony Music with the 'big evil corporate' brush, whatever you do. Oh no. It juddered into action overnight, like it had been nudged in the ribs, telling media: "As we have previously shared with our artists and their representatives, net proceeds realised by Sony Music from the monetisation of equity interests that were provided to Sony Music as part of the consideration for a digital license will be shared with our artists on a basis consistent with our breakage policy".

Which is interesting, given in a legal battle with management firm 19, where the major's Spotify equity was raised, Sony Music's lawyers were pretty adamant that the company had no obligation to share anything with artists that wasn't directly derived from their recordings. Though that isn't necessarily a change in policy, in that Sony could argue it has no obligation to share such income with artists, but it's going to do it anyway, because it's that nice.

Either way, these commitments are all good news for the artist community, and for the labels, who desperately need subscription services to become profitable successful businesses, and who desperately need artists to join them on that journey. Though, as any lawyer will tell you, the devil is in the detail, and not just because the detail is time consuming and lawyers charge by the hour.

The commitments made by the indies, and Warner, and subsequently Sony and, on breakage, Universal, are all good news. Though speak to most artist managers today and rampant confusion remains as to what these commitments actually mean, how payments will be calculated, and when they will be paid. And beyond breakage and equity, what about those mysterious set-up fees?

Which brings you back to bad label/artist communication, NDA culture and the fundamental need for more transparency across the supply chain of music. Of course artists and their reps would like more money. Breakage, brilliant! Equity, yes please!

But actually, most managers would rather have a clear understanding of what deals are being done on what terms; the fact that the label is keeping the majority of the cash may be just a commercial necessity, but not knowing what money is coming in and how it is being shared is the real frustration.

As the UK's Music Managers Forum recently noted, when new kid on the streaming block Cür Music went live last month, the only information available to artists and managers on the deals the labels had done came from the start-up's own company filings, not from their business partners within the music industry. Though, that doesn't mean the MMF isn't welcoming the latest developments in the streaming deal domain.

Its CEO Annabella Coldrick said last night: "Record companies taking an equity stake in streaming services has become increasingly prevalent and it is essential artists see the value as well. Warner and Sony are demonstrating industry leadership and aligning their interests with artists by committing to share proceeds from the sale of Spotify shares. This is a positive development for the longterm health of the industry. We call upon Universal to follow suit. And see our 'Dissecting The Digital Dollar' report for a full exploration of the issues around streaming".

What, this 'Dissecting The Digital Dollar' report? Why not take a read? Maybe the section on the digital pie debate. Yeah, Steve, if you really want to pioneer, be the first major music rights owner with interests in both recordings and songs to declare that the digital pound should be shared a little more equally between the two music rights.

Given contractual conventions means music rights companies usually get to keep the majority of recording revenue - while publishing contracts are tipped in the songwriter's favour - the major that nevertheless recognises that the current recording/song split in streaming isn't fair will be the real radical in town.

SFX gets access to its bankruptcy loan
Party time at SFX then! Albeit a bankruptcy party. That's the best kind of party though, I reckon. Yes, a judge has approved a bankruptcy loan being made to the flagging EDM company by the money-lenders who are planning to take the firm back into private ownership and swap their debts for equity.

As previously reported, the long struggling EDM giant finally applied for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection on Monday, having called in consultants last month in a last ditch attempt to rescue the company. Under the proposed bankruptcy, an "ad hoc group" of bondholders will write off debt, provide short-term financing, and then take ownership of the dance music festival promoter and Beatport operator.

The short-term financing is a $115 billion bankruptcy loan which will be used to pay off some of the lenders outside of restructuring arrangement, and to provide cash flow for the company's ongoing expenses. According to the Wall Street Journal, a bankruptcy judge gave permission for $80 million of that funding to be handed over on Wednesday. The company was also given interim approval to pay utility bills, critical vendors and employees.

According to the Journal, we now know that unsecured creditors and equity holders in the SFX parent company are unlikely to "receive a recovery". Though the biggest of those equity holders, founder Robert FX Sillerman, will have a stake in the new private company that should come out of the bankruptcy proceedings.

As previously reported, SFX insists that it is business as usual at its various subsidiaries as all this goes through the motions, and that once the all-new parent company is up and running, cut free of all its debts, everything will be rosy again. Though if all else fails, Deadmau5 has offered fourteen million for "whatever is left" of SFX, in a tweet that noted Sillerman had said in 2012 "I know nothing about EDM". "Yeah... We see that", adds the producer.

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Norwich venue The Owl Sanctuary finds new home
Norwich venue The Owl Sanctuary has found new premises, following the previously reported announcement that it was being forced to leave the building it has occupied to date due to a change of ownership.

In a Facebook update yesterday, the venue's operators said: "After looking into several different options we have found our new home, located on Timber Hill in the city, and we aim to be open again on 19 Feb at 5pm, it's an ambitious deadline but we feel it's achievable".

The new venue will have the same capacity as its predecessor, and all previously announced shows from 19 Feb onwards will go ahead as planned. Team Owl also announced that a crowdfunding campaign set up to save the venue had left a surplus, after covering the cost of the deposit on the new venue and outstanding wages for staff, and that cash will now be donated to mental health charity Mind.

New Executive Chairman at MTV owner
MTV owner Viacom has a new Executive Chairman in the form of Philippe Dauman, who adds the title to his existing list of President and CEO of the media firm.

A long-time Viacom exec, Dauman takes over from Sumner Redstone, the company's long-time chief and majority shareholder. There has been much speculation about Redstone's health of late, and he also stood down this week from the Chairman role at his other media business, CBS Corp. He will remain as Chairman Emeritus of both companies.

The news that Dauman would simply extend his remit and replace Redstone at the top of Viacom was not especially well received by all of the company's investors, many of whom had been pushing for someone more independent to occupy the Chairman's seat. And Redstone's daughter Shari, who turned down the Executive Chairman post herself, remaining as Vice-Chair instead, was also reportedly of the opinion that the role should not go to someone "intertwined in Redstone family matters". That would include Dauman, because he sits on the board of her father's trust.

However, William Schwartz, who leads the governance and nominating committee of Viacom's board, said: "Philippe has been instrumental with Sumner in every aspect of Viacom's success for nearly 30 years and most recently as CEO has taken on the tough task of navigating our future in a time of unprecedented innovation and disruption. He has laid out a strategic long-term vision for the company that we fully endorse. We have complete confidence that his dedication to Viacom, his global experience and his determination to further our culture of creativity and innovation will continue to serve the interests of all shareholders and build long-term value".

Venues Day 2016 date announced
I know you're all still recovering from the very recent Independent Venues Week, but I just wanted to let you know that Venues Day 2016 is coming up. Not for a while though, don't worry, you'll be able to catch your breath. The Music Venue Trust's annual one-day conference will take place on 18 Oct at the Roundhouse in London.

The Music Venue Trusts's Beverley Whitrick said earlier this week: "Venues Day is an important opportunity to bring together representatives from grassroots music venues across the UK and discuss the things that are important to them. Each year we aim to move the agenda forward, improving awareness of the issues and seeking solutions to the challenges. Working with an esteemed venue like Roundhouse will attract further key partners to join us in this work".

Tickets will go on sale in August, and the first line-up announcement is coming in May.

  Vigsy's Club Tip: The Winter Social Festival
Tomorrow the Kent Showground in Detling, just north of Maidstone, hosts the winter incarnation of the Social Festival. Thirteen hours of raving in a couple of massive tents. And as an all day event, you don't have to worry about ending up sleeping under a bush, or in one of Kent's many alligator-ridden swamps, while you wait for Sunday morning's first train.

I could say more, but I think the line-up more than speaks for itself: Adam Beyer, Âme, Art Department, B.Traits, Eats Everything, Eli & Fur, Guy Gerber, Joris Voorn, Maya Jane Coles, Nic Fanciulli, Nina Kraviz, Rob Cockerton, Russ Yallop, Steve Lawler and Yousef.

Saturday 6 Feb, Kent Show Ground, Maidstone, Kent, ME14 3JF, 11am-midnight, £48.50. More info here.
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Earth, Wind & Fire's Maurice White dies
Earth, Wind & Fire founder Maurice White has died, aged 74. He was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease in 1992, but his condition is said to have worsened in recent months.

His brother Verdine, bassist for Earth, Wind & Fire, said in a statement: "My brother, hero and best friend Maurice White passed away peacefully last night in his sleep. While the world has lost another great musician and legend, our family asks that our privacy is respected as we start what will be a very difficult and life changing transition in our lives. Thank you for your prayers and well wishes".

Meanwhile, the band said on their website: "The light is he, shining on you and me" - a line from their 1976 song 'Spirit'.

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Phil Anselmo offers to quit Down, following racism row
Former Pantera frontman Phil Anselmo has urged his current band Down to carry on without him, after he sparked a racism scandal last week.

At a tribute show for late Pantera guitarist 'Dimebag' Darrell Abbott, Anselmo was seen on stage giving a Nazi salute and shouting "white power". Anselmo later insisted that this was an in-joke about bands being served white wine backstage. But this has been disputed by others - particularly Machine Head's Robb Flynn - and it isn't the first time the musician has been accused of racism.

Anthrax's Scott Ian has also strongly condemned Anselmo's actions, calling on him to make a donation to the Simon Wiesenthal Center, which works to fight anti-Semitism, in order to show the strength of his eventual apology.

Having been a matter of much debate over the last week, the incident has now begun to have a knock on effect commercially, with Anselmo's band Down dropped from the line-up of Dutch festival FortaRock. In a statement, organisers said: "There has been close consultation between all parties in recent days, since we wanted to make a well informed decision. On that basis, the decision is made to cancel [Down's performance]. We want to make clear that there is no room for racism or fascism on FortaRock".

In the wake of this, Anselmo issued a new apology on his website, saying: "I am utterly responsible for the mistakes I have made, and can only give you my word to no longer do them in the present, through ACTION, not just mere words ... My biggest obstacle(s) are the over-indulging in the booze and blurting out spiteful, ignorant reductions of the human spirit itself. I will address these issues, head-on. I'm repulsed by my own actions, and the self-loathing I'm going through right now is justified by the hurt I've caused".

As for the effect this was now having on the other members of Down, he said: "My bandmates are now experiencing the consequences of my behaviour, and I now publicly apologise to them as well. Never in my entire lifetime would I drag them down with me, and I've privately suggested to them that they move on without me".

The band have not responded directly, though guitarist Pepper Keenan said in a lengthy update on Facebook yesterday that, while he was "saddened and confused" by Anselmo's behaviour last week, he hoped that "at this moment in time Phil will focus his energy on self-reflection and begin the process of regaining perspective, healing himself and those lives he has touched through music".

The Field announces new album
The Field, aka producer Axel Willner, will release a new album through Kompakt, titled 'The Follower', on 1 Apr.

"As always when starting a new album, I wanted to do something that sounds fresh, but doesn't stray too far from what I have so far done as The Field", says Willner. "And that's always the tricky part. The whole album came around through experimenting with a lot of new recording equipment and gear".

It's not just about updated technology though, he adds: "'The Follower' is about old myths, finding utopia and how mankind repeatedly makes the same mistakes over and over".

There's nothing for you to listen to yet, so here's the tracklist instead:

The Follower
Pink Sun
Monte Verita
Soft Streams
Raise The Dead
Reflecting Lights

ASCAP, Help Musicians UK, Deezer, more

Other notable announcements and developments today...

• US collecting society ASCAP's only gone and made Paul Rourke its new EVP and CFO. So many letters. "I am THRILLED", said Rourke. "Paul", added CEO Elizabeth Matthews.

• Help Musicians UK has named Claire Gevaux as its first Creative Director. She joins from the Foundation For FutureLondon where she led the creative vision for Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park (you know, where the Olympics was and that). "This is an important appointment for the charity as it moves towards the launch of a new strategy this year", says Chief Exec Richard Robinson.

• You remember when it emerged that a large proportion of Deezer's users are inactive customers who received their accounts as part of a bundle with their mobile phone contract? Well, Deezer's just done a deal with Huawei to preload its software on the phone manufacturer's devices. "With just one touch, listeners can access the largest music catalogue in the world, as well as over 40,000 podcasts, personalised mixes and audiobooks", says Deezer's Gerrit Schumann. Or not.

• Ticketscript has updated its online ticket selling tools, which should mean they look nicer and work better. "Every single aspect of the new Ticketshop has been refined to create the most seamless ticket buying experience ever", says CEO Frans Jonker.

• The Association Of Independent Festivals has announced a series of events in conjunction with BIMM at its Brighton and Manchester campuses this April. More info here.

• Would you like to do a bit of keyboard playing and singing for M83? Well, if you are a woman with those skills, and have nothing in the diary for the rest of the year, a valid passport and no criminal record, today could be your lucky day.

• US TV producer Larry Schwarz is offering a $10,000 reward to anyone who wants to record a song he wrote called 'God Is Friends With Me' for some reason. Well, not anyone, they have to be Christian as well as being dead good and popular. Also American. If that sounds like you, have a listen to your future signature tune here.

• Katy B has done a new song with Major Lazer AND Craig David. Sorry, I should have checked you were all sitting down before telling you that. Here it is.

• Kloe has released her debut EP, 'Teenage Craze'. It is very, very good. Here's the title track from it.

CMU Beef Of The Week #292: Tidal v Universal
Time-keeping's a funny thing, isn't it? I like to think that I am okay at it. At least, professionally speaking, I think it's important to arrive on time for things. Though I also have a tendency to get lost and misjudge how long it takes to travel to places. It is for this reason that I have missed more than one plane in my life. Okay, three. It's three. I've missed three planes. Shut up.

Anyway, it really makes me feel guilty when I'm late for meetings, so I really try hard to always be on time. And I think I roughly do a good job of it. Still, if the other person is late I always act like I only just arrived too. Because maybe that person is feeling bad like I would, and there's no reason to start a meeting off with nit-picking over how long I had to stand on the street. I have a smartphone, I'll always be fine.

Conversely, in my personal life, my wife and I have a bit of a reputation for always being late for things. To the point that our friends on the whole just don't bother turning up on time to meet us for stuff, because they can be pretty sure we won't be there. I don't know what it is, but something about the two of us together really messes up both of our time-keeping skills.

If we both concentrate really hard on it then we can get to places on time - sometimes even early - but mostly we're just swanning about with all the time in the world one minute, then the next moment we're in a mad panic, rushing around with three minutes to make it somewhere that'll take us at least 30 to get to, if we're lucky.

No one's going to stop being friends with us because we're a little bit late though, are they? I mean, there are plenty of other reasons people might want to stop being friends with me, but slightly shoddy time-keeping isn't one. Especially if you've just cultivated that fact into something like an underwritten character trait in a mildly amusing sitcom.

Not sure why I chose to say "mildly amusing" there. I was thinking of 'Friends', which I never really found funny at all. But then I remembered that a lot of people do like it and I said "mildly amusing" out of a fear of social conflict. I didn't name the sitcom though, so there really wasn't any need. Not sure what that was all about.

'Friends', though. Come on, if you really think about it, it was a pretty terrible show. Maybe not as bad as 'Big Bang Theory', which is fucking dreadful, but it definitely wasn't very funny. That's the problem with sitcoms. They're prone to become more sit than com. And 'Friends' really had that problem from the start. If anything it became more of a soap opera. Is character development the enemy of comedy? No, probably not, but in some cases it can override comedy in a way that is detrimental to it.

I guess Alan Partridge has developed as a character over time, and he's stayed funny. Though I suppose the development has been quite gradual, and really he hasn't changed that much since the days of 'Knowing Me, Knowing You'. Perhaps the film developed him a bit too much. Though I'd say the problem with that was more that the whole thing descended a bit too much into farce once the story left the radio studio, and they sort of lost control of the story. But I enjoyed it other than that.

I mean, if you really want a comedy film that loses control of its story, the 'League Of Gentlemen' one's it. What the hell happened there? The second half of that was really awful.

It was on TV one Christmas and my family all wanted to watch it, because they hadn't seen it before. I saw it in the cinema and told them not to bother, that they'd regret it. But they insisted. So I started watching it with them, because I assumed they'd give up and we could watch something else quite quickly. But then it starts pretty well. It's quite funny and engaging. They all told me they couldn't understand why I was so down on it. And to be honest, I couldn't understand it either.

Then I got a phonecall and left the room for 20 minutes. When I came back into the living room my family were all sat there with faces like they'd been through some terrible ordeal. The change is quite sudden with that film, and once it's happened, it doesn't come back from it. Though the line, "they put me in a box with my coat on" is quite good in context. It's not enough though. Really, not enough. Never watch that film, if you haven't already. Your life will be better for it.

Anyway, I was talking about time-keeping. As well as being late, a pretty bad thing in professional settings is being early. Don't turn up dead early for things when people have allotted a time in their busy day to speak to you. Maybe they will be able to drop everything at a moment's notice, but you also run the risk of messing up their whole schedule, and that doesn't create a good impression. Not at all.

Last week Rihanna's new album appeared on Tidal slightly earlier than intended. Then it was taken down again. And then reappeared as scheduled. Tidal blamed Universal for the error. Universal said it was Tidal's fault. It was quite the squabble. Definitely the beef of the week. Though that's more to do with the week than the beef.

 
ANDY MALT | Editor
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