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And Finally Artist News
Moby claims he rubbed his penis on Donald Trump
By Andy Malt | Published on Monday 29 April 2019
It wasn’t that long ago that we could only wonder which pop penises had come into contact with politicians. Now, suddenly, everyone’s talking about it. Recently we learned that Pop Will Eat Itself drummer Fuzz Townsend once dunked his genitals into Boris Johnson’s beer. Now Moby’s claiming to have rubbed his right up against Donald Trump’s leg.
Trump wasn’t a politician at the time – assuming you consider him one now – the incident taking place at a party in 2001, when Trump was still just a silly billionaire businessman.
“The party wasn’t that exciting”, Moby tells The Sunday Times. “It was mainly full of businessmen and real estate developers, most notably Donald Trump, who was standing a few yards away, talking loudly to some other guests. I drank a shot of vodka to brace myself, pulled my flaccid penis out of my trousers and casually walked past Trump, trying to brush the edge of his jacket with my penis”.
Somehow, no one seems to have noticed the penis, or Moby bobbing back and forth as he attempted to slap it against Trump.
“Luckily he didn’t seem to notice or even twitch”, says Moby of Trump’s non-reaction. “I returned to my friends and ordered another drink”.
So, the denouement of this story is that Moby might have touched Donald Trump’s jacket with his cock once. I think we’re going to need more certainty in any future stories in this series. Or everyone could just keep their trousers on.
Anyway, as well as adding to the pop penis politician prodding cannon, this is just the latest slightly odd story involving Moby and Trump. The musician has previously claimed to have insider information on collusion between the current US President and Russia. He said last year that “active and former CIA members” had given him the information over dinner and then encouraged him to share it online because he had a bigger social media following than them.
