What is the essence of rock n roll? Is it an attitude? A political stance? Nihilism? A haircut? No, the essence of rock n roll is shoes. Uncomfortable shoes. That, at least, is the opinion of Machine Gun Kelly. Although he has now apologised for thinking that.
Speaking on the Rock This podcast earlier this month, the musician - who shifted his sound from hip hop to pop-punk with his latest album - really let loose on bands who wear shoes that don't meet his approval.
"This is very important, the state of rock and roll depends on rock stars", he said. "I gotta see some 'fuck you'. I want some attitude, dude".
So far, so Liam Gallagher. But then he went on: "Look, this is what I fucking hate. This is what I will tell you. I did the Warped Tour, and these motherfuckers would wear comfortable shoes on stage every day. Fuck your fucking Nike, New Balance fucking comfy shoes, because it makes you feel comfortable".
"Put on some Doc Martens, you fucking fucker", he continued. "Put on some fucking Chucks, put on some Vans. It's not about you, it's about the show. You don't look cool, man. I fucking hate your feet. I hate your shoes. I hate everything about your... shit, you're comfortable. Rock n roll's not about being comfortable, it's uncomfortable. It's a metaphor. Your shoes are a metaphor. Fuck you".
I'm not sure Doc Martens, Converse or Vans would necessarily like to be depicted as uncomfortable shoemakers. Although for Vans, it might be more concerned that it came last in a list of shoe brands after a mention of the tour that it sponsors.
Whatever, yesterday people suddenly noticed that MGK had said all this and as a result he's taken a lot of stick on social media. So much so that he has now (sort of) apologised.
"To the bands mad I said they wear 'comfy shoes' - I'm very sorry that I can get you this upset just by talking about your little pointy New Balances", he tweeted. "I wear pink so like... what do I know anyway?"
So, hey, shall we call that a truce? I still think it's almost admirable that someone could get so angry about shoes though. And I do kind of agree with him. You really shouldn't go on stage looking like you took a wrong turn on your way to the shop to buy some milk.
Except for that time I saw The Fall and that was exactly how Mark E Smith looked. But you know, you always need an exception to prove the rule.