Madonna has said some things (actually, quite a lot of things, there's a high chance you'll fall asleep while reading this story, though we've got a bit of an exclusive at the end of it, so stick with us) about her rather contentious crucifix scene that pissed off all those Christians during her World Tour, which finished in Japan yesterday.
In a statement Madonna said: "I am very grateful that my show was so well received all over the world. But there seems to be many misinterpretations about my appearance on the cross and I wanted to explain it myself once and for all".
"There is a segment in my show where three of my dancers 'confess' or share harrowing experiences from their childhood that they ultimately overcame. My 'confession' follows and takes place on a crucifix that I ultimately come down from. This is not a mocking of the church. It is no different than a person wearing a cross or 'taking up the cross' as it says in the Bible. My performance is neither anti-Christian, sacrilegious or blasphemous. Rather, it is my plea to the audience to encourage mankind to help one another and to see the world as a unified whole. I believe in my heart that if Jesus were alive today he would be doing the same thing".
"My specific intent is to bring attention to the millions of children in Africa who are dying every day, and are living without care, without medicine and without hope. I am asking people to open their hearts and minds to get involved in whatever way they can. The song ends with a quote from the Bible's Book Of Matthew: 'For I was hungry and you gave me food. I was naked and you gave me clothing. I was sick and you took care of me and God replied, 'Whatever you did for the least of my brothers... you did it to me''. Please do not pass judgment without seeing my show."
In an exclusive interview with CMU, God says he now accepts Madonna's explanation and won't be striking her down anytime soon, though he added that he's increasingly bored with the singer's pretentious ramblings, and is a much bigger Goldfrapp fan these days anyway.